Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
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It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
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You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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