I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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