I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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