I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
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i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
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Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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