in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize