she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I made him laugh his dick is mine
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize