I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
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dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
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Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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