Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize