when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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