this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize