Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
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