If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize