i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize