And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize