Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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