i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize