Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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