She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
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The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
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And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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