Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
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he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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