I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize