No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
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It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
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He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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