She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
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