I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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