yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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