my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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