Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize