We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize