I just cut my nipple shaving
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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