You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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