Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
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We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
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New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
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