so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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