Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Randomize