I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
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He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
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We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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