if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
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