In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize