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A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
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