he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
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