you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Drunk is a universal language darling
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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