She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
She's just so happy...and so naked.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize