Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me i tasted like america
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize