SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
birth control should be required to get into college
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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