I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize