I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize