Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
two words: eviction party
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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