You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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