My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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