somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
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no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
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The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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