he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize