one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a blind-side dick pic.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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