while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize